Tuesday, 3 March 2015

The wife and the cheating husband



There are some men (emphasis on some) who can cheat for Africa. People say African men are polygamous in nature; Scratch that all men and it seems as though it is socially acceptable for men to cheat, society doesn’t ask questions. Infact you would be seeing public officers openly displaying their infidelity like kilode. Wives are used to their men pursuing small girls even underage girls like a headless chicken. I have even heard stories of men spending their wedding eve with their side chick and leaving her bed straight to Church to get married to the main babe, maka why?

These chronic cheats do it without shame, they are not even hiding it sef, if dem no fear and respect their wives at least make them fear God.


My problem lies with the advice ladies give themselves when someone complains about a cheating spouse; “keep praying for him” “don’t confront him oh” cook well for him and serve him very well” “dress up good for him” “give him hotter sex in bed” “if you leave him there are other women waiting to come in” . I am wondering is the reward for cheating a better behaved and loving wife? Better sex and good food? In her desperate attempt to win her man back from the claws of the husband snatchers aka Assistant Madam aka Ashawo kobo kobo.

What’s the man supposed to do in all this, just sit and watch the wife “fight” for her marriage. The responsibility of fixing this situation lies with the woman, she fights with all she’s got to preserve the marriage. If a woman cheats, hmmm Abomination!!! They would call family meeting, they might even beat her up, infact she is leaving the house that day sef.
Please don’t get it twisted, it’s our responsibility as wives to play our part in keeping our home, dress well, and give him mind blowing sex, strive each day to be his babe he met and fell in love with, don’t deny him sex unjustly and don’t nag nag nag cos seriously there are wolves out there waiting to pounce so beware.

The thing though is; a cheat would always cheat, even if you have a body that’s a cross between Kim Kardashian, BeyoncĂ© and Nicki Minaj and even if you like give him snake in the monkey shadow style during sex, Bros would still go out of his way to cheat. You see his wife is a lovely unique fruit but he just prefers fruit salad.

I don’t know if these men calculate the amount of time, money and resources spent on sneaking and going out of their way to cheat on their partners and the fact that they make their homes open and vulnerable to attacks and diseases.

Why are we women satisfied with; “after all I am the one he has at home” I would keep praying” “maybe I did something wrong” or “I can’t stop living this life this man has afforded me, the shopping sprees, endless gifts, first class travel” and begin to hold men accountable and responsible for their actions. Whatever happened to all the promises he made and the vows he took on the altar.

As usual I want to read your views, me I have said mine oh, over to you my lovely readers.

Photo credit: meetville.com


25 comments:

  1. Cheating in marriage by either partner is a reflection of a deeper problem of morality.
    We live in a highly sexualized world, were chastity is not appreciated even if we all claim to be Christians. I have severed several relationships cos l was not ready to get down with some girls. These same girls that engage in pre marital sex would expect the man to be faithful after marriage, karma kicks in.

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    1. Sadly, chastity has been thrown to the winds. But we still have some people out there who wear their chastity belt proudly. Also are you saying karma comes around for those who engage in premarital sex and not just those Who sleep with other people's spouses?

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  2. I feel everyone has a choice cos even beggars have choices. A woman who sees a cheating husband as an accessory to a better life would grow old in gossip in the eyes of the public. Excuse my french, Shit paves way for Shit to happen. Before getting married to this man, you must have been with him for a period of time. Gone are the days a man meets a woman in the morning and marry her in the evening. During the period of dating, there will be potholes, gossips and stuff. Oversight is not allowed. In every story, there is an epitome of truth in it. Africa's mentally about marriage states that, a successful woman without a husband is like an elephant grass without an elephant feeding on it. Men take privileges in this and make the woman counterfeit in her own home. Hmm, sometimes I feel God owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology cos this world is worse than it ever was.

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    1. Yea, true talk.lots of women settle. But sometimes also she might not have noticed this during courtship or he might not have cheated during their days of dating.

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  3. People cheat as they please. I tire na only God fit help us.

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    1. I tire oh! God would indeed help us.

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    2. But we can help ourselves.
      God help those who help themselves.

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    3. But we can help ourselves.
      God help those who help themselves.

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  4. My advice to couples is that they should get tested on a regular interval.

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    1. That also means letting each other know they don't trust themselves

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    2. You can look at it from that angle and also from the fact that HIV can be contracted through needles.

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    3. You can look at it from that angle and also from the fact that HIV can be contracted through needles.

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  6. I appreciate my husband and other non cheating husbands. happy weekend

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    1. You are blessed. We thank God for those men who have proved that though it is tough it can still be done.

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  7. Hmmmmm story for the gods!
    Sometime last year on one of Lagos radio stations, a woman complained that her hubby cheats without shame so she decided to use protection every time they get down but he refuses and sometimes forces himself on her. So no fair!

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    1. hmm sad story. but we pray soon all these would be a thing of the past.

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  8. Human beings were never deigned and wired biologically to be stagnant with one particular stuff forever which exlplains why we change our food menu,change clothes,cars and even relocate to other parts of the world.So that's why sticking to one brodokambusilodus as a man or. Woman is a task more difficult than sailing the world in pontu !

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    1. like why eat a fruit when you can have a bowl of fruit salad.

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  9. Mind you,a woman in the society we come from stand to lose a whole lot if divorce arises.The westerners are trying their best to cub the cheating menace by imposing all kings of laws. In favor of women but believe me cheating is here to stay.Solomon had 300 wives and 700 concubines just to show tha variety is the spice of life.

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    1. But why expose your spouse to unnecessary health risk for just 1 minute of pleasure?

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    2. But why expose your spouse to unnecessary health risk for just 1 minute of pleasure?

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  10. We humans are just a little bit different from other animals though we both share the same sexual urge and instincts.Let's say we are more upgraded than an avarage monkey or lion.Sex and what we call cheating is a biological thing and not social or religious.

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    1. King Ikemefuna you are saying it's biological to cheat but why did God create 1 Adam and 1 Eve for each other? He probably should have created 1 Adam, 1 Eve, 1 Ada and 1 Aisha. Also note that David and Solomon's love for women are what led them astray. Plenty women plenty trouble HRH King Ikemefuna.

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